Lost in teaching

To say I have had a bad month would be accurate.  This has been an incredibly hard last few weeks in my job.  I feel at a loss for teaching the youth at my church.

Several weeks ago I was ready to go back to teaching and was seriously considering leaving this kind of "professional" ministry behind.  It is really hard.

And I am not equipped.

I have this incredible group of youth that I work with.  30-40 kids each week.  So many different personalities.  The kids are so different that you wouldn't expect to see them all together in a group, and yet here they are.

I have leaders in my group and followers; kids who wrestle with school and kids who have dropped out; kids who are excellent students; kids who are poor; kids who are affluent; kids who are sexually active; kids who are pure; kids who demand attention; kids who I cannot get to talk out loud.

I have been feeling like a bad teacher.  I've gotten out of the rhythm of weekly planning because we had Christmas break and then a retreat and then youth sunday.  Now I have to get back in the grove, so I am writing in hopes that I will find some ideas or at least a direction.

This year we are finding Jesus through the entire Bible.  We have scoured the Old Testament like spies and found that even in Genesis there are allusions to the one who was to come... Sweet, Powerful, King Jesus.

Now we are to the new testament.  We are beginning to look at Jesus the person, his teachings, and the epistles.  His teachings...

I am overwhelmed by some of the choices my kids are making.  Really stupid choices.  Partying, driving drunk, smoking pot, etc.  Stupid moves.  I am also overwhelmed by the grip that sin has on our lives.

I have been attending a 12 step group lately and am overwhelmed by the destructive power of sin in my life and in the lives of those around me.  This illness which devastates lives and destroys relationships.  It turns people into something far from who they were created to be.

I want to talk about Sin.  It is a cunning, baffling, and powerful disease.  It is the root of the problem.

Life is not about sin management and Christianity not about just moral development.  It is about combating the effects of sin and death and finding a new way - a glorious path of light and beauty.  It is about surrender to a Loving and Kind God who defeated death and sin and can defeat those things in me.

Surrender....

I wonder if there is a game called surrender.

Maybe we will look at the beatitudes in Matthew and talk about this guy who spoke these words and explore the concept of Surrender.